Friday, April 27, 2012

Unsettled

Life is just packed with important doings - like finding a way to do a Bible time with the little girls in the mornings (which is working out well)

and the Important Things In Disguise - like keeping house despite all the forces which conspire against that monumental task

and the Invisible-but-ever-so-real-undercurrents-of-thought - which accompany us every minute and help shape attitudes and actions.  Lately I've been full of thoughts on finding community; I struggle with feeling rooted, or not so rooted, as we know that we will be moving at some point in the future.  Whether we'll be leaving in the next month or the next couple of years depends on the vicissitudes of my husband's career.  This unsettled feeling bothers me, because I long for the peace that I imagine comes with settling someplace for good.  Of course, a hundred sermons and devotionals on dwelling in peacefulness above and despite circumstance echo in my head!  We aren't supposed to let circumstance determine how joyful or peaceful we are....

but it would still be wonderful to

-live near-ish to old established friendships and family members
-plant a garden in our own yard
-or even have a yard, I suppose
-really settle into a church, knowing that we will dwell alongside these fellow believers for years to come

oh, excuse me, am I rambling?

In the meantime, I am blooming where I'm planted (at least I hope I am) and am enjoying palm trees, wearing sandals and sundresses during all but 2 and a half months of the year, and all other good aspects of our urban desert home right now.  I've even continued to settle into our apartment: I've hung up 4 more pictures on the walls and installed even more hooks where I've needed them....all the while thinking, "Heather, should you bother installing this? are we moving next week?"

very unsettling.


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